shrek剧本(编辑修改稿)

shrek剧本(编辑修改稿)内容摘要：

easy. Just kiss her dead, frozen lips and find out what a live wire she is. Come on. Give it up for Snow White! And last, but certainly not last, bachelorette number three is a fiery redhead from a dragonguarded castle surrounded by hot boiling lava! But don39。 t let that cool you off. She39。 s a loaded pistol who likes pina colads and getting caught in the rain. Yours for the rescuing, Princess Fiona! So will it be bachelorette number one, bachelorette number two or bachelorette number three? Two! Two! Three! Three! Two! Two! Three! Three? One? {Shudders} Three? Three! Pick number three, my lord! Okay, okay, uh, number three! Lord Farquaad, you39。 ve chosen Princess Fiona. If you like pina coladas And getting caught in the rain Princess Fiona. If you39。 re not into yoga She39。 s perfect. All I have to do is just find someone who can go But I probably should mention the little thing that happens at night. I39。 ll do it. Yes, but after sunset Silence! I will make this Princess Fiona my queen, and DuLoc will finally have the perfect king! Captain, assemble your finest men. We39。 re going to have a tournament. But that39。 s it. That39。 s it right there. That39。 s DuLoc. I told ya I39。 d find it. So, that must be Lord Farquaad39。 s castle. Uhhuh. That39。 s the place. Do you think maybe he39。 s pensating for something? {Laughs} {Groans} Hey, wait. Wait up, Shrek. Hurry, darling. We39。 re late. Hurry. Hey, you! {Screams} Wait a second. Look, I39。 m not gonna eat you. I just I just {Whimpering} {Sighs} {Whimpering, Groans} {Turnstile clatters} {Chuckles} {Sighs} It39。 s quiet. Too quiet. {Creaking} Where is everybody? Hey, look at this! {Clattering, whirring, clicking} Wele to DuLoc such a perfect town Here we have some rules Let us lay them down Don39。 t make waves, stay in line And we39。 ll get along fine DuLoc is perfect place Please keep off of the grass Shine your shoes, wipe your... face DuLoc is, DuLoc is DuLoc is perfect ...... place {Camera shutter clicks {Whirring} Wow! Let39。 s do that again! No. No. No, no, no! No. {Trumpet fanfare} {Crowd cheering} Brave knights. You are the best and brightest in all the land. Today one of you shall prove himself All right. You39。 re going the right way for a smacked bottom. Sorry about that. {Cheering} That champion shall have the honor no, no the privilege to go forth and rescue the lovely Princess Fiona from the fiery keep of the dragon. If for any reason the winner is unsuccessful, the first runnerup will take his place and so on and so forth. Some of you mae die, but it39。 s a sacrifice I am willing to make. {Cheering} Let the tournament begin! {Gasps} Oh! What is that? {Gasping} It39。 s hideous! Ah, that39。 s not very nice. It39。 s just a donkey. Indeed. Knights, new plan! The one who kills the e will be named champion! Have it him! Get him! Oh, hey! Now e on! Hang on now. Go ahead! Get him! Can39。 t we just settle this over a pint? Kill the beast! No? All right then. Come on! I don39。 t give a damn about my reputation You39。 re living in the past It39。 s a new generation Damn! {Whinnying} A girl can do what she wants to do And that39。 s what I39。 m gonna do And I don39。 t give a damn about my bad reputation Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Not me Me, me, me Hey, Shrek, tag me! Tag me! And I don39。 t give a damn about my bad reputation Never said I wanted to improve my station Ah! {Laughs} And I39。 m always feelin39。 good when I39。 m having fun Yeah! And I don39。 t have to please no one The chair! Give him the chair! And I don39。 t give a damn about my bad reputation Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Not me Me, me, me Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Not me, not me {Bell dings} {Cheering} {Laughs} Oh, yeah! Ah! Ah! Thank you! Thank you very much! I39。 m here till Thursday. Try the veal! Ha, ha! {Shrek laughs} {Crowd gasping, murmuring} Shall I give the order, sir? No, I have a better idea. People of DuLoc, I give you our champion! What? Congratulations, e. You39。 re won the honor of embarking on a great and noble quest. Quest? I39。 m already in a quest, a quest to get my swamp back. Your swamp? Yeah, my swamp! Where you dumped those tale creatures! {Crowd murmuring} Indeed. All right, e. I39。 ll make you a deal. Go on this quest for me, and I39。 ll give you your swamp back. Exactly the way it was? Down to the last slimecovered toadstool. And the squatters? As good as gone. What kind of quest? Let me get this straight. You39。 re gonna go fight a dragon and rescue a princess just so Farquaad will give you back a swamp which you only don39。 t have because he filled it full of freaks in the first place. Is that about right? Maybe there39。 s a good reason donkeys shouldn39。 t talk. I don39。 t get it. Why don39。 t you just pull some of that e stuff on him? Throttle him, lay siege to his fortress, grinds his bones to make your bread, the whole e trip. Oh, I know what. Maybe I could have decapitated an entire village and put their heads on a pike, gotten a knife, cut open their spleen and drink their fluids. Does that sound good to you? Uh, no, not really, no. For your information, there39。 s a lot more to es than people think. Example? Example? Okay, um, es are like onions. {Sniffs} They stink? Yes No! They make you cry? No! You leave them in the sun, they get all brown, start sproutin39。 little white hairs. No! Layers! Onions have layers. Orges have layers! Onions have layers. You get it? We both have layers. {Sighs} Oh, you both have layers. Oh. {Sniffs} You know, not everybody likes onions. Cake! Everybody loves cakes! Cakes have layers. I don39。 t care... what everyone likes. Orges are not like cakes. You know what else everybody like。